What do you do when you come to the end of your options? I’ve been here before, and it’s a lonely place to be. But I don’t think it has ever been this desperate. Having a family truly changes everything.
A few years ago we made the decision to put family before career – and the results were devastating. I don’t regret that decision at all. But it has been tough. We didn’t exactly have a backup plan, and that made it tougher than it needed to be, but nonetheless, here we are.
I never thought I’d go back into EMS, but it certainly seemed like the best option given the state of the economy. As you may know, I am now a licensed paramedic, working the streets of Portland again. Well, I was until last month when I took a temporary leave of absence. The long hours, the night shift, and the long commute is killing me and my family. So, decided to take some time off.
Now, a few weeks later, it is getting close to going back to work – but I’m not sure I can do that. The work itself is easy, almost boring, it’s the sitting in an ambulance for 12 hours straight, long commutes, late nights, sleeping during the day while my family tries to survive, and sinking slowly into deeper and deeper sleep debt. This is the part I don’t think I can do anymore.
There’s just that small little thing, how to support my family? I think we’re out of options.